I'm Probably Gonna Get Sued For This

I'm Probably Gonna Get Sued For This

As you all know, I am a wrestling fan. While it isn't as well known these days as it was way back in my youth, I still keep myself relatively up to date with the goings on of the WWE and to a lesser extent TNA. Now, I'm not the guy that is going to go stake myself out in the floor lounge to watch every week, but if I see it on, I'll probably check it out until I either get bored or find it way too ridiculous. That is why I came up with this, taking the current WWE roster, I am going to go over a series of storylines that could be used on television if they were smart. The only change to the current roster is that I am going to re-hire Cryme Tyme...not just because they were funny but because they would work the part I need, I also am going to re-hire Teddy Hart. So, without further ado...

First things first, trade Snitsky to Smackdown for MVP, Hardcore Holly/Jim Duggan to Smackdown for Chris Masters and Kenny Dykstra and Santino Marelli/Super Crazy to ECW for CM Punk/Elijah Burke. From there begin a feud with the returning Cryme Tyme with Cade and Murdoch. Have Cryme Tyme return as a team of thugs instead of the fun guys they used to be, sell it on the way they were fired as a means to get over. Wait a couple weeks and give them the belts after they destroy the tag team ranks of Raw and go on to start trying to recruit Superstars such as Elijah Burke, MVP and Shelton Benjamin. Have Burke and MVP join up but delay Shelton for a couple weeks to set up a will he/won't he situation and end it with Benjamin turning on Haas to start a feud there. While this is going on, keep up the Shawn Michaels feud with Orton, maybe even giving Michaels a small run there going in to Survivor Series. During a promo for Michaels, have Harry Smith cut in talking about his families history, bring up the Montreal Screw Job and say that he wants to bury the hatchet between Michaels and the Hart family at Survivor Series. End Survivor series with the New Hart Foundation debut with Teddy Hart, Nattie Neidhart and TJ Wilson screwing over Michaels and giving Orton the title. From there have Michaels and inevitably HHH feud with the New Hart Foundation to put them over. The following night, have Orton cut a promo where Cryme Tyme, Burke, MVP and Shelton come out to intimidate Orton saying that their boss wants to "meet" with him. Lead this up for a few weeks and reveal the boss to be a returning heel Lashley and set up a Randy Orton/Bobby Lashley feud. Have Orton form a counter-alliance with Charlie Haas, Cody Rodes and Kenny Dykstra as the "New Blood" tag team, Chris Masters and Ken Kennedy. Jeff Hardy can feud with Umaga and Carlito over the IC belt, the tag belts can go between Cryme Tyme, the New Blood, Hart Foundation, Kendrick and London, Cade and Murdoch and anyone else they want to throw in there. Have Lashley beat Orton for the belt and play and Orton sidelined storyline giving Kennedy the chance to challenge and elevate himself. When the time comes, they can do the John Cena return and even have him go heel and side with Lashley or even take over Lashley's crew after a loss to Kennedy for the belt.

Accounting for nearly everyone on the Raw roster, aside from the pending Chris Jericho return, and then also adding a few familiar faces, this is a surefire way to bring back the old faction feel to Raw in a limited fashion as a hope to boost ratings and garner new interest. Sure, it may sound like a re-hash of the Nation of Domination, but it worked and can probably work again. It's not like they haven't reused old storylines and factions before, look at the nWo and DX.

It is only when I finish this that I realize how much of a nerd I am, or how much I should be writing for WWE, or both. See what the Red Sox do to me?

Credit for names, characters, everything to WWE including it's logo. Please don't sue me, I promise I know the product.

Fall Break Week 8 Picks

I just wanted to go out on a limb here and give a list of the top 5 dumbest things of the week. So here we go...

5. New England Fans
What can I say about New England fans that hasn't been said everywhere else. You're all obnoxious fucks that annoy the shit out of me. 95% of you are sad sacks of shit, to the 5% that aren't obnoxious, I'm sorry that you're associated with these assclowns.

4. KU Fans
Congratulations, you're 8-0, but who have you played? You can win out and you still won't get the national championship game, and even if you do, you'll more than likely get crushed by whoever you end up playing unless it ends up being BC.

3. The 10 Year Old On ESPN
Man, you're cool dressing up like Ditka and all. It's too bad FOX was doing that lame routine about 3 years ago when Caliendo started. I'm glad to know you can learn what ESPN tells you to say and then repeat it in front of a camera, but maybe you should think for yourself.

2. Cartoon Network
Don't get me wrong, I was really into the whole Goosebumps thing when I was young. They were great books, and while the show was kind of lame, it was pretty cool to see the books acted out in a manner that was kind of shitty. Anyway, why are you showing live action stuff now? I don't think that those are cartoons.

1. Fall Break
I think I'm maybe the only one that agrees with this, but why is it that a school that sees the whole population leave every weekend feels the need to give us a fall break? Everyone is going to go home anyway. You faught and faught to get us this break and it's pointless, just give us another 2 days for Thanksgiving and not have class that week.

Things That I Like This Week:

• College Football
• Night Of The Living Dead @ 2AM
• Sleeping
• 30 Days Of Night
• The Looming Halloween

WEEK 8 PICKS
9-5 last week, 56-47 on the year. Winners in bold.

Bears (3-4) v Detroit (4-2)

Steelers (4-2) v Bengals (2-4)

Titans (4-2) v Raiders (2-4)

Rams (0-7) v Browns (3-3)

Giants (5-2) v Dolphins (0-7)

Vikings (2-4) v Eagles (2-4)

Colts (6-0) v Panthers (4-2)

Jets (1-6) v Bills (2-4)

Chargers (3-3) v Texans (3-4)

Bucs (4-3) v Jags (4-2)

Pats (7-0) v Redskins (4-2)

Saints (2-4) v 49ers (2-4)

Broncos (3-3) v Packers (5-1) (MNF)

Week 7 and Homecoming

gotta love the theme this year

I go to a small college right now as opposed to being like everyone else I graduated with and going to KU or KSU, more specifically, I go to Emporia State in Emporia, KS. It's a nice smaller town that gets moderate support from the community ranging from the businesses that bend over backwards for us to the businesses that go only as far as hanging a poster for the current play or current sports team schedules and then on the bottom rung which is the businesses who try to act like the college doesn't exist. This weekend is also Homecoming for us, and yet again, I'm failing to get excited for it. In past years we have been blessed with such horrible themes as "Oh Wow, A Luau" and "Dancin in the Street" which actually gave this year promise when I saw that the theme was "Old Time Black and Gold." To the uninitiated, this is a play off of the song "Old Time Rock and Roll" they just changed rock and roll with our school colors, get it? It's funny. Now, I'm not completely sure on what other schools may do to celebrate homecoming, but I feel like we get stuck with nothing but events that probably wouldn't even make it into a high school homecoming celebration. On the lineup this year, we have tricycle races, a night of shitty skits put on by the fraternities and sororities all finished up by the usual football game that I am sure we will end up losing. Ya know, the other departments always bitch about how noone shows up to the school events because they're out partying and such, but maybe if they put on events that were, oh maybe fun, then they might get a bolstered attendance. The non greek population of the school doesn't enjoy going to events where the school kisses ass to the greeks, so why would they bother going? It seems fairly common sense to me. The other thing that bothers me in the football team. How long do I have to go through school with teams that don't win? After I graduated high school, their team got really good and now contends for state every year, and now I'm at Emporia State where we have a fairly underachieving team who will probably kick ass after I graduate. I was at the game last weekend, like I am every weekend we have home games and I noticed something interesting about the difference between the two teams. Washburn is huge. They have some very large players on the team, whereas we have little guys who bulk up certain parts of their bodies...the arms. Is Emporia trying to make a point by playing smaller players on the team instead of recruiting some of the larger guys coming out of high school? Is this bound to pay off for us in the long run? Will we get a homecoming win this year? I doubt it, we'll probably be unable to execute on the same draw play and fail to try anything else. Just a couple of the billion things wrong with the school I guess, oh well, maybe they will all enjoy the RA's playing a game of tug of war at halftime...I won't get my hopes up.

WEEK 7 PICKS
47-42 on the year after a shitty week last week. I need to quit slacking.

Ravens v Bills

Lions v Bucs

Pats v Dolphins

Saints v Falcons - Streak time

Giants v 49ers

Redskins v Cards

Texans v Titans - No Vinsanity means no win

Bengals v Jets

Chiefs v Raiders

Cowboys v Vikings - I've got Purple Jesus fever

Bears v Eagles

Seahawks v Rams

Steelers v Broncos (SNF) - Can't go against my team

Jaguars v Colts (MNF) - It's bound to happen sooner or later

Enjoy the weekend, I know I'll have a blast working the whole thing.

Week 6 Picks and Shit

i love double meanings, especially when they make fun of KU

As anyone who knows me will attest, I hate KU. Yes, I'm from Kansas, but I cannot stand Lawrence, KU, or anything that has any remote connection to the school...unless it's a friend and then I'm fairly tolerant. This usually gets the response of people asking me if I am a K-state fan instead, to which I must respond to with a resounding "NO" as well. I don't like any of the Kansas schools as far as college sports go, barring the exception that is Emporia State, and only because I go there. I never became a fan of college sports until my senior year of high school when I went to Alabama to visit my Grandma, and that was when I found out that they have a channel devoted to nothing but Crimson Tide sports. After watching that channel for 2 weeks straight, I knew pretty much everything about the football team and was pretty sure I had finally found a college team that I enjoyed. I liked the craziness of the fans, the prestige of the team even if the weren't winning it all every year, and best of all, it was a jumping on point in which they weren't doing well ensuring that it wouldn't be called a bandwagoning moment. So now, it's 5 years later and I've seen them do shitty, mediocre, and even good. It's given me another degree of fandom in the NFL as well, now I have former Bama players to root for, and hate as in the case of Derrick Thomas. I also know the basketball team too, which really says something for me as a fan because I really don't like basketball that much. But, back to the point, I hate KU. The worst part of it is when people I know assume that my hatred for KU is because I'm a K-state fan, as evidenced on Saturday when KU beast K-state at football. The game was close, but had been over for about an hour when I get a text message from a female friend of mine who will remain nameless, it says "take that, ROCK CHALK BABY!" Now, I do talk a lot of shit on KU, but for them to be so excited about beating nothing but cupcake opponents, and then a weak K-state side is ridiculous. Play real teams and go 5-0, I bet you'll go 0-5 and your coach will suffer a heart attack on the sideline. I heard from a friend of mine that he went in to a restaurant and Mangini came in to eat, it was a buffet and Mangini kept eating and eating and ate the restaurant out of food and they had to close forever. Actually, that was loosely from The Simpsons, but my friend did say that he ate about 3 appetizers and then somewhere around 2 meals and a few drinks...my guess is that he then went to McDonalds afterward. Mangini makes me take back every Jabba The Hutt joke I ever made about Charlie Weiss, and then transfer it all to Mangini. If I ever see KU play a "real" team this year, and by real I mean a team that isn't considered a cupcake, then I assure you that they will lose faster than you can say "every Chiefs QB ever has sucked, with exception of Joe Montana, Brodie Croyle and Len Dawson." It saddens me to know that I have so many friends who make the poor life decision of being a KU fan, but as long as they have their rock chalk, I'll still give them mine...Rock Chalk Gayhawk, Fuck KU!

DENVER BRONCOS: After last week, all I have to say is thank God they are on bye. I hope they can get their shit together after that pitiful performance to the Chargers. It felt like the Chargers just forgot about every other game and them prepared for nothing but Denver for the first 4 weeks of the season. Jesus Denver needs to do something.

WEEK 6 PICKS, HOME TEAM IN CAPS, WINNER IN BOLD
(41-35 on the year)
Rams v RAVENS - This is gonna be ugly, and I only pick STL because the Ravens D is that bad.

Redskins v PACKERS

Titans v BUCCANEERS

Bengals v CHIEFS - The Bengals don't need a defense to beat the Chiefs, just keep the Offense off the field with long, slow drives

Eagles v JETS - Crap shoot.

JAGUARS v Texans

BEARS v Vikings - Adrian Peterson, for the win.

BROWNS v Dolphins

CARDINALS v Panthers

Raiders v CHARGERS

Patriots v COWBOYS - For all that is good and holy I want both teams to somehow lose, but if I have to pick it's the lesser of two evils in the Pats.

SEAHAWKS v Saints

Giants v FALCONS - I cannot understand why this game is the Monday Night game, I feel like they need flex scheduling sooner rather than later. The same goes for the Sunday Night game. Excellent scheduling NFL, way to go.

ALCS AND NLCS PICKS, WINNERS IN BOLD
INDIANS over Boston in 5 - I hate Boston, but I also hate the Indians, so this isn't a bias pick. The Indians have been hot as of late, and I have a feeling Boston will choke.

ROCKIES over Arizona in 6 - Colorado has been so hot as of late, and despite the Diamondbacks having beat them the only time in about the past 20, I cannot see it happening more than twice.

Silly Trent Green, I Don't Pity You...Too Much

Sucks It Had To Happen, But He Kinda Had It Coming

That was the scene Sunday when, for the second year in a row, Trent Green got carted off with a concussion after making a very, very stupid decision. In week one of last year, Trent Green was scrambling to make a first down when he got hit when making an attempt at a slide. Green was well withing the distance to make the first down and get out of bounds, but he made the idiotic choice to slide instead. Robert Geathers was demonized for that hit, despite being in the process of tackling well before Green attempted to slide, and also despite that he was essentially clipped into Green by his own wide-receiver, Eddie Kennison. Even the NFL came out and said that it was a clean hit, but as usual, the ignorant Kansas City Chiefs fans that I have the misfortune of being in the general vicinity of felt the need to still call it a cheap hit. Yesterday, Trent Green was making a block for his team on Travis Johnson, the only problem for this block was that it was at Johnson's knee. I don't care who the hell you think you are on a football field, YOU DO NOT GO FOR ANOTHER PLAYER'S KNEE! Instead of ending Johnson's season, and potentially career, Trent Green went down with another concussion and was carted off of the field, and in the aftermath, Johnson was penalized for taunting Green as he lay on the ground. The backlash against Johnson has been ridiculous for his taunting Green, yet, it doesn't bother me. Yeah, it sucks for Trent Green that he got taken out with another concussion, but at the same time, he shouldn't have made such a horrible block. To reiterate my point earlier, YOU DO NO GO FOR ANOTHER PLAYER'S KNEE! Trent Green is at a point in his career that he needs to be looking out for himself, that means he needs to quit putting himself in dangerous situations like this. If he can't bring himself to correctly block and not do it in a fashion that could ruin the career of the player that he is blocking, then Trent Green has no business blocking people at all. As far as I'm concerned, Travis Johnson was right in "taunting" Trent Green as he lay on the field. How would it have looked the other way around if Green laying the block, and his helmet, into Johnson's knee had left Johnson on the ground unable to continue playing, possibly ending his career because Green couldn't put a legit block on him? The worst part of all of this is that thanks to ESPN, I am going to have to listen to nothing this week but people talking about how horrible a person Travis Johnson is because he taunted Green while he was on the ground, yet noone will point out that Green was easily the player in the wrong with the block that he tried to lay on Johnson. It's horrible to say, but I really do hope that this time Trent sees that he isn't the player he was and finally decides to hang it up and be done, before he goes back out there and messes himself up even more, or even worse, messes someone else up bad enough that they cannot continues to make their living.

"My knee ain't never hurt like it hurt today. If you want to hit me, hit me in my head, hit me in my chest, don't hit me in my knee. I'm trying to eat just like everybody else. So, to hit me like that, that showed me what type of man he was." - Travis Johnson

Week 5 Picks: So far, I'm 8-5 this week. San Francisco, Detroit, Denver, Tampa Bay and Green Bay couldn't get it done for me.

MLB Playoffs: So far, I'm right on my picks. Now I just need those damned Yankees to just quit and lose.

Monday Night Football Pick: Dallas. I wish they would lose to Buffalo, but it's not going to happen. It kind of says something when, on the Monday Night Previews, they tout Tony Romo and the Cowboys...and then they are left with noone to tout for the Bills but Marshawn Lynch.

Thanks to Google Images for the picture and KSK for the quote

So I've Noticed I Don't Do Much But Make Picks...

Christmas Tree Says Don't Do Drugs

Christmas is about 2 months away, which means time to start making that wonderful list of things I desire that most people call a Christmas List. Now, I know that some families probably don't start doing this stuff until November, but in my family we live by a simple rule, "show up late to everything, and do Christmas Lists 2 months early" the way it has been since I was born. The one thing that I hate about these lists is that video games are so hard to do, half the games I will put on here probably aren't out yet, so I don't know how good they are. Another thing, this list would have about 5 more items on it, but I've hit the point with extended family where I don't get anything anymore. Oh well, life goes on, and I can't wait to screw over my brother and sister's kids like that.

Under .500 Christmas 1

Jay Cutler Denver Jersey: Jay is, as a friend would say, Da Fewtcha (sound it out), so why not get the official replica jersey of such person? Sure, there is the potential that he could go all Brian Griese, Bubby Brister, Gus Frerotte, and Jake Plummer on us and suck in the end, but that is a risk I am willing to take.

Harry Potter 1-7 Box Set: I don't care what anyone says, Harry Potter is awesome. Granted, none of the books I actually own thanks to my sister, but I figure it's time to shell out.

Dragonball Z Seasons 1 and 2: This show was so bad ass when I was a youngin, and now that it is uncut on DVD, it is a lot cooler. I don't care how nerdy it is.

Blue Dragon: The first of my video game choices for the holiday season. This game has been out since August, but why buy it when I can get it for free?

WWE Raw Vs. Smackdown 2008: After some of my posts, are you really surprised by this? New rosters, new modes, the ability to put my own music in for entrances and CM Punk make this well worthwhile.

Assassin's Creed: XBOX360 game number 3 on the list. Granted, it isn't out until November, I am hoping, praying and otherwise wishing it doesn't suck. It looks so completely bad ass though, that I don't think it will suck.

Grindhouse Special Edition: I know that it hasn't been announced at all, but I am hoping so badly that they release this. I don't want to buy them separate, I want them in all their 4 hour glory. I sat through it that long in theaters for a reason.

A Denver Broncos Super Bowl: It's worth a shot.

Peyton Manning Injured: Once again, it's worth a shot, and I think a lot of other NFL players wouldn't mind it either.

World Peace: This one is for the little kiddies, the environment, and the wee turtles. Who will save the wee turtles?

On To The Week 5 Picks:

Jac @ KC - If they can beat denver
CLE @ NE
CAR @ NO
NYJ @ NYG - Welcome to "The Suck"
MIA @ HOU
SEA @ PIT - I'd say that Seattle would avenge the Super Bowl loss, but it's the regular season
DET @ WAS - Win number whatever, I think 4 of 10
ATL @ TEN
ARI @ STL
TB @ IND - Another week of picking against them, please come true.
SD @ DEN - For everything good and holy in the world.
BAL @ SF
CHI @ GB

And Now Because I Can, and I'm Only 3 Days Late...

Rockies over Phillies

Bo Sox over Angels

Arizona over Cubbies

Indians over Yankees - If I have to see Boston/New York again I'll cry.

And now I leave you with Klassic Krusty...Please go commit Regicide now.

Thanks Google Images...again.